kintsukuroi

“to repair with gold” – this term is intended for use when pottery is repaired with silver or gold and thought to be more beautiful than before because it was broken and mended. 

 

Lately i’ve been trying to see myself in the same way. I’ve been broken many times (by boys, friends, strangers and mostly myself) but there’s nothing that says I can’t repair myself and end up even more put together than I started out. To start, I tell myself every morning on the way to work that i’m in a good mood..mind over matter right? I’ve also begun to attempt to be one of those people that people have the impression of always being cheery and someone that people look forward to seeing. Nobody likes a gloomy gus! Clearly, since most of the people reading this come in contact with me on a somewhat regular basis, I don’t succeed at this nearly as often as I would like. That being said, I’m actually starting to see a difference in my outlook and genuinely take pleasure in knowing that I made someone feel better, brightened their day a smidge, or just plain didn’t ruin it. 

 

Anyhow- along those lines I’ll tell you about the start of my week! Tuesday was the first day in the past 7 months or so that I spent a lot of the work day doing desk jobs…taking inventory, making spreadsheets and so on. It was strange but in some way made me feel more like I belong in the lab and not like the new girl that does the odd jobs-hooray! I’ve been trying to take initiative in the extra jobs that I’ve been given since my hiring last July and prove that I can handle the workload, not only successfully but high above any expectations. So far i’m going with the whole “fake it ’till you make it” philosophy…As for home life I keep telling myself that I don’t need to be obsessive about exercise, normal people don’t have to walk 3 miles everyday in order to stay slim, or eat the same exact thing day after day to maintain the same weight…if it’s raining and i’m exhausted then a lap around the neighborhood with Rowena is good enough and if it’s a special occasion then I can have pie. Another psychological battle is the whole dating scene, so I’ve been repeating that I will sacrifice my time, energy, mileage and gas in order to pursue someone/something that has potential. 

All in all, I’m aiming for the stars and if i bounce around earth, ricochet off some planets and the moon in the process then that’s okay…those are cool places too 🙂 

Enjoy your wednesday! (humpdayyyyy)

❤ Erin

Advertisements

About Erin Goes Blah- I rant forever

Ever heard of Erin Go Brah? The horse obviously, not the saying! I'm him, in human form but slightly less successful and well known. Perhaps you've also heard of a man named William Shakespeare? In "A mid-summer nights dream" he says, "though she be but little, she is fierce" in reference to Hermia...I have a little bit of that in my mix too. I'm a 26-year-old big kid with occasional adult tendencies just trying to figure out my place in life. Chronically single and exhausted I am the keeper of two jobs and three pets. With approximately 2 hours of free time per day, ​I tend to use it relaxing- leading to much musings and wonderment. I plan on using this blog to reach out to others, and to my inner conscience to better understand my odd habits and talk myself out of them. I hope to bring attention to those in eating disorder recovery, by being open about my hardships and hurdles. I'm weird, silly and looking for someone to share the love with :)
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s